Yea you're my friend but...

Yea you're my friend, but...

In past month or so, there has been some personal drama stirring around. Not mine, but friends. This personal issue has been quite explosive. It has torn a friendship in two, causing a jets vs the sharks rivalry, and the local bar is the school dance. Let the angry choreography and finger snaps break out...

Through all of this, I have tried to be Switzerland; be the neutral party. Hear both sides and not try to sway one way or the other. In the recent days however, I have come to realize that this is impossible. How could I possibly be perfectly neutral? One person was able to tell their story to me first. I have had my own personal biases from the beginning, and have had a different past with all parties involved. And dammit, I am a woman with an opinion. The only way I could actually be neutral were to be if I was a) a robot, or b) Svetlana from Lithuania who couldn't understand a damn word they were saying anyways!

But I still try. I try to be kind, pleasant, and civil to everyone, try not to be rude, keep things to myself when it comes to outsiders, and overrall be mature and respectful of each party to keep things as peaceful and civil as possible.

But there have been problems that have risen through this dispute. Friends. Friends that, although they have the best intentions, seem to be taking on the dispute of the initial party and taking it on themselves, fueling the fire and stirring the pot. I'm a huge supporter of friendship and loyalty - really what is friendship without loyalty - but here comes a time when you, as the friend trying to defend the honour of your best, have to step back, wipe your hands clean and let the people in the front lines duke it out on their own.

It's like Sarah in the Labryinth (and no, I will not stop using pop culture metaphors, so get used to it). She had to face Jareth alone. Although all her friends wanted to help, it was her personal battle, and they all had to realize this for her to win.

Wait? Did she win? I mean, yea, she got her brother back, but other than that and limitless stairs and David Bowie ballads, there wasn't really a battle to be won or lost...hmm... Well. now I'm rambling...

ANYWAYS!

This is a discussion to be had between two people, no one else. A wise friend said to me the other night "it is none of my goddamned business". This was an epiphany moment for me. Yea! It IS none of my business!! Let them duke it out, converse civilly, bare knuckle brawl, whatever they have to do to finally move forward and away from all this personal stress and drama. If anything is to diffuse or settle, they have to do it, but we have to step back and shut the fuck up already.

Oh, and I am fully aware this is a "pot calling the kettle black" thing I'm doing right now. As I am writing this, I'm meddling in some way. No one knows I'm writing this. Yes, I am definitely a hypocrite for writing it, but that's why I'm ending it with this statement:

From this moment on, I am not talking about this. It is none of my goddamned business. I will always be a friend, I will always be there for you. I'm there if you need me, I'll always be there for anything. And if, for whatever reason, we can't be friends, I will always be civil and respectful of you. Other than that, I'm staying out of it and I hope that things will one day be worked out. This anger is exhausting for everyone, and I hope you both find the strength to find peace.

I'm going to shut up now.
Well, about this at least.


Friend rant ended.

-janeovision.


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