Showing posts with label selfiindulgent rant. Show all posts
Showing posts with label selfiindulgent rant. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

'cuz you gotta have faith.

I've been thinking about faith lately.

Not just the religious type, (I haven't been religious in years) but the faith we put in others, in ourselves, in the stranger on the bus or the cab driver taking us home.

It seems to me that many people put the stereotype of 'bible-thumpers' on the word faith. Many believe that faith automatically points toward religion, to the limitations of some of those beliefs, shutting out others and other ideas, accosting those that aren't "on your side" and nearly stifling others with you "Faith".

Now, I've gone down a few of the religious paths before settling in my comfortable world of atheism. I was raised Roman-Catholic, practiced Wiccan for 3 years, and even looked into other religions. I"ve seen the beliefs of other religions, in education, in the media and in public practice. I've even watched (and loved) Kevin Smith's Dogma, and rethought the word "Belief" and "Faith". In my 25-ish years of being surrounded by religion and faith and the love and hate and anger and etc. that has come about in my lifetime, I have realized this:

It doesn't matter what you believe. It's even okay if you don't believe at all. What matters is where your faith lies and that you have any faith at all.

And we all have faith. Somewhere.

Faith to me is trusting those around me, the people I choose to have in my life, and those that happen to pass through, will be good to me and will be there for me. I have faith that when times are tough, I have that friend that will call me or text me and send me a little bit of love, regardless how small. Faith is also knowing that sometimes they won't be there. Sometimes they can't, whether they don't see you in need, or whether they are too wrapped up in their own lives. And this is where faith in yourself comes in. When you feel alone, stuck, trapped, royally screwed, or whatever. When those times comes and it feels like you are gasping for air, knowing you can keep moving forward, because it will get better. You are strong enough to get through whatever it is that is pulling you down.

Faith even goes out to those strangers we pass every day. The girl that catches up with you because you dropped $5. Or that cab driver that finds your phone, charges it and calls your last number so you can get your phone back. Or that man that pulls you back when you're not looking and saves you from being smucked by a bus. That old lady who sees you at the bus stop asking if you're ok, be cause you 'looked sad' Those little things and big things that people do for you. They have no idea who you are. You could be a horrible person, you could be a wonderful person, but they see you as just another, and reach out to you. They take that moment out of their own life to make sure you are ok and you don't have to worry or be bummed or hurt. These people aren't every person we pass, but the ones that do are the ones that surprise you.

It's a nice surprise too.

I think this post comes from the recent teen suicides that have surfaced in the news. It reminded me of high school, dealing with bullies, being called names (including a lesbian) and having those days where you feel like you're drowning. Having faith in those around me, in myself, and in the potential of what was ahead was what kept me going some days.

Everyone has faith. Everyone has to. Otherwise, at those dark moments, we'll just get lost.

If anyone who's struggling out there is reading this, have faith. Stay strong. Whatever you have faith in, hold onto it. It's your powerhouse. It will keep you going. It gets better.


...'Cuz you gotta have faith.


-janeovision

Saturday, July 24, 2010

self-indulgent rant...

Ok, the past few days have been less than great.

Still looking for an apartment.
Still looking for a job-well, scratch that, looking for a BETTER job. The one I went for was smoke and mirrors and a shit call-center in awesome sheepsclothing.

But I'm not going to dwell on that today! Today I'm going to write about some of the awesome little things in life. Cuz yknow what? Sometimes it's the little things that keep you going.

The other day I was at a friends place and he was showing me his new button-up shirt he got. I was very tempted to steal it (and I almost did!) because I realized the awesomeness of the mens shirt.

Whenever I wear one - which is relatively often - I feel so frickin' confident and sexy and overall totally amazing!! They just hang so nicely on me, with rolled up sleeves and either tucked in or hanging loose, it creates this brilliant silhouette on the body! Even if it's hanging away from your form, it somehow creates this illusion of hotness; almost the "less-is-more" idea, or as I like to think guys think, "more-is-less"; as in "the more clothes you wear and the more you cover, the less I want you to be wearing them because I want those clothes on my bedroom floor".

Don't tell me you don't think that, guys.

I've even noticed a few looks from guys today. It may be the shirt, it may be the waythe shirt makes me feel, either way, I'm liking it.

So after my few crummy days, today I wore my favourite mens shirt. And regardless of everything else, I feel pretty damn fabulous today.

... I guess I should mention a second thing, since I said "some" of the things that are awesome.

Shorts. Shorts are awesome because they aren't pants. They are like fancy underwear. Those that know me know I am not the biggest fan of pants. So I love summer simply for the shorts.

Self-indulgent rant ended.

-janeovision


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